


I Thought I was Enough

by Museu



Series: A Light In The Darkness [5]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: A little Angs, Cute, Established Relationship, Language, M/M, Mpreg, Multiple Pov, Wincest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-06
Updated: 2014-04-06
Packaged: 2018-01-18 08:07:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1420846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Museu/pseuds/Museu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when after two years of living together, Dean finally has the itch to do something stupid; like lie to Sam? And what happens when Sam can’t deal with the fact that Dean will never change and that he will never be enough for Dean? Continuation to my series A light in the Darkness.</p><p>Here is the next short fic. Sam and Dean are a little out of character, but it couldn't be helped. Please enjoy and let me know your thoughts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Thought I was Enough

After two years of this new life and out of the complete blue I get the sudden itch to do something stupid and selfish like keep a secret from Sam. I haven’t told him because I know that he is going to react badly to the news especially now in his current pregnant condition. He gets irritated and moody without much provocation, and of course he blames it on the hormones or me. So telling him that I have been tracking residue or the leftovers after the gates of hell were close is a big _No_. I’ve been keeping an eye out for anything supernatural, and everything has been quite except for a couple of weird occurrences a couple of months apart. Which brings me to my current predicament of lying to the bearer of my children, the love of my life, and soul mate.

It helps that I work at the garage and I have to stay late some days, so when this sudden need to hunt takes over I use that as an excuse. I’m also taking some night classes and Sam only looks at me half convinced when I tell him I’m meeting up for a group project.

I keep telling myself that this will be the last one, that it is justified because people are dying and i’m protecting my neighborhood (although the case is five miles away). The thing is that there is a nymph -- no doubt the last of its kind -- that has been literally luring men to their death. The damn thing would go to bars and pick the most willing and with one touch of her saliva and a whisper of her voice she would have men bending over to do anything she wishes. It took me a week to track the damn nymph and another two days to get a hold of the thing that can kill it, and in all that time I was trying not to get fired from my day job and not have Sam find out that I’ve been sneaking around.

  


For two years I’ve been waiting for the other shoe to drop. Dean has been acting... not like Dean. I thought I knew where I stood with him and a part of me always expect him to be really bad at relationships like use the brother card and do whatever he wants because he is older. Or I half expected him to sleep with the next thing with a miniskirt within a week after we moved into our new house. But no, to my complete surprise he has been...good? He has been uncharacteristically romantic like buying presents and taking me out to dinner, minimal complaining when I have to drag him to playdates with Dea’s daycare friends. And aside from our regular bickery and occasional arguments, everything has been normal, well as normal as it can ever get with us. Well that was until it wasn’t.

I have been feeling moody and queasy all day because of the baby. And to add to it all I have to worry that Dean is cheating on me with some miniskirt. He was great when I told him about my pregnancy. Well great wouldn’t be the right word, maybe overprotective, possessive, scary sweet? Apparently Dean can truly be sweet to people other than Dea. But his recent behavior makes me wonder if he ever wanted this, this life with me and our kids.

I hear a noise to my side and for a moment I have forgotten that I am not alone.

“Sam _please_ tell me that we are not talking about your boy problem again. You do realize I am a heterasexual male right? Couldn’t you call Amelia or your hot neighbor Kim?” Jeff says before he takes a bite of his sandwich.

We are sitting outside on a bench overlooking the university’s library. I teach my class in twenty minutes and I insisted that we have lunch outside to get some fresh air and see if the dizziness that I have been feeling all day subsides.

I completely ignore Jeff’s comment, we have had the same argument a million time, and he will lose every time. I need to talk about this and about Dean and he is the only one I can count on right now. Cas has been MIA for a while and only seems to show up for special occasions, and Bobby would probably tell me to stop acting like a wuss, that Dean is not cheating.  And Amelia has her hands full with the new born.

“I’m telling you. He is definitely cheating on me, I can feel it. He has been sneaking around, coming home late, even Dea notices that he hasn’t been there for her bedtime stories. Tell me thats not textbook for cheating?” I face Jeff and his face shows sympathy.  I put away my peanut butter tuna sandwich which I have been craving all day but I find that I am no longer feeling very hungry.

“Sorry man, but this is Dean we are talking about. He freaking holds you on a pedestal especially for the past couple of months.” Jeff takes a bite of his sandwich and says as an after thought, “He wouldn’t cheat on you.”

Dean has been acting like a total overprotective possessive bastard since I told him that I was pregnant seven months ago. And everytime we go out together and someone looks at me in the wrong way or gets too close, he is ready to take their heads off. I think he is overcompensating for not having been there for the first pregnancy especially with all the complications.

“I know he wouldn’t, but for first time in two years he is giving me a reason to doubt him.”  One night Dean came in at one in the morning and he expect me to believe that he was working on a group project for his class.  “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I can deal with the flirting because that’s his personally and i don’t want him to change, but I don’t think I can forgive him for this one.”

“Let me at least talk to him.” Jeff shifts on the bench and takes the last bite of his sandwich. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

“Thanks, I appreciated it.” I’m feeling a little relieved that I have friends that care.

Jeff smiles and gets up from the bench and tosses the wraps of his lunch on the garbage can close by. “Yeah, yeah. You know i’m only doing it for your little girl. Now can we please stop all this talk of emotions?”

I smile, “Yeah man. Dean would be proud of your emotional detachment.”

“Hey, we both know that the only reason Dean tolerates my ass is because I haven’t tried hitting on you.”

I let out a small laugh. Jeff is only half right. Dean would totally kick Jeff’s  ass if he so much as blink at me in the wrong way, and hints on wanting anything other than a platonic relationship. But the  truth is that ever since I met Jeff and introduced him to Dean, they have become great friends, if only because they are so much alike and share a passion for classic cars.

I stand as well and we head towards class.

  


_Later that night…._

Dea comes running into the kitchen with Sam’s phone on her hands.

“Dad Dad, phone is ringing.” Dea says very enthusiastic and she is jumping up and down trying to get Sam’s attention.

“Thank you baby,” Sam says as he takes the phone from her and he sighs when he sees that is Dean who is calling. He already knows why he is calling.

Dea brings her hands up and Sam picks her and sets her on his hips before he answers.

“Hey Dean.”  Sam speaks on the phone.

 _“Hey Sammy, I’ll be home a little late tonight. We just got new parts for this Camaro and the owner is paying extra to have it fixed asap.”_ Dean’s husky voice comes through the phone.

“Daddy, Daddy.” Dea squirms in Sam’s arms, trying to snatch the phone to say hello to her daddy.

Sam shifts Dea in his arms and he holds the phone with a little more force. “Dean this is the fourth night in a row...and for the last couple of weeks you been staying either at work or working on school projects.” And Sam really wants to be piss off, but the warm body he is holding is keeping him leveled.

 _“This really needs to get done and you know we could use the extra money...”_ Any other person would miss the anger in Sam’s voice, but Dean knows him too well.

Sam sighs feeling resigned, “I know, is just...I feel like I barely see you anymore with both our schedules and classes.”

_“Aww Samantha, don’t worry I’ll make it up to you.”_

“Daddy, Daddy” Dea says again still squirming in Sam’s arms.

“Dean don’t okay?” Sam says wanting this conversation to remain serious. He isn’t some batter housewife or lost love puppy, but damn it if Dean is going to continue to behave like such a jerk by lying to him. “ I…Dea has been missing your bedtime stories.”

Dean sighs and says,   _“Babe, I know I’m sorry…”_ He usually just use words of endearment when he is apologizing or right after sex when he is all relaxed.

“I know you are. Just be home as as soon as you can, okay?” Dean sounds sorry. But sorry that he isn’t home, that he is missing Dea’s bedtime story, that they haven’t been seeing each other properly in four days, or that what they have is no longer enough?

Is that thought of Dean being with anyone else that sets Sam’s blood on fire.  Sam is not some damsel in distress, but he demands some respect, as Dean’s brother, husband and father of his children. Enough is enough and he refuses to be lied to any more. His hormones are acting up and he is very close to either throwing a tantrum and break down crying or murder the next thing that gets in his way.  Dean got another thing coming if he thinks that he is getting away with this.

****  
“Yeah I’ll be home soon”  Dean is sitting in the Impala right outside the bar where the nymph is. He almost want to turn around and go home to Sammy, but he can really get her tonight. He hangs up the phone and steps out to head towards the bar.  
****

Back at the house Sam is looking pensive and he decides that is time for action. “Come on De-girl you are going to stay with Kim for a few hours.” Sam takes Dea back to her room and packs a small bag with some toys a few change of clothes and heads back to the kitchen to add a bottle of milk and a few jars of baby formula. It doesn’t hurt to be over prepare.

Today Sam is going to find out what Dean has really been up to.

  


Dean walks into the bar in blue jeans and leather jacket. He radiates confidence and there are a few eyes on him. Dean looks around and the bar is packed with people and  he knows that it might turn out to be difficult to pinpoint the nymph.  He settles for taking a sit on a stool near the bar and he orders a beer. Dean gets a few interested glances his way and he finds himself giving them a flirtatious grin which earn him a few free drinks, but he firmly rejects the two different propositions he gets to leave the bar for other activities other than drinking or talking.

He finds that he likes the attention, it just reminds him that he still got it. That if he really wanted he could have anybody in this bar. But going out with anybody in the bar is to experience nothing more than sex, and as girly as it sounds, he has a really good thing waiting for him at home.

Dean is on his third beer and he knows that he should stop, because if Sam can smell it on him he is a dead man. He has been stalking this place for nearly two hours with nothing promising, until this brunette walks in and he has this weird feeling in his gut, and Dean knows that she is the nymph.

He walks up to her and he can hear the sound of paradise and promises that she is producing. The sound is almost intoxicating and Dean can’t seem to want to hear anything other than her voice ever again. He feels lust building in him and his body is responding yelling at him to take this woman and mate with her. Dean automatically knows that it is her allure that he is hearing. He pats his leather jacket to make sure his bronze dagger dipped in an infected victim's blood -- which he got from the morgue after using his old FBI badge --  is still secure. As long as he doesn’t come into close contact with her saliva, he can resist her allure.  All Dean has to do is get her to come out with him, and he can take her out on the back valley.

She is surrounded by men and as Dean draws closer he gives her his best grin and she automatically buys it by smiling broadly. “Hey there sweetheart, mind if i buy you a drink?” Dean says.

The nymph looks human, a very hot looking woman.  She is tall and slim and she is wearing a short red dress that fits her like a second skin and she leaves nothing to the imagination with the impressive cleavage she is revealing.

She looks at Dean up and down and makes this small satisfying sound making it known that she is appreciative of the sight in front of her. “Yeah, I can use a drink.” She licks her lips and puts down the clear drink she had in her hand.

The flock of men around her began to dissipate.  “How about we take it back to my place?” Her voice flows like molasses and it would be too easy to fall under her spell, if Dean didn’t know what she is or what she is capable of.

Dean smirks again thinking about how easy she is making this. “I wouldn’t mind a little more privacy.”

They both make it outside and she is clinging to Dean, and Dean is trying really hard to void her attempts at kissing.

_A couple of hours later…_

  


It takes me another hour and half just to get her out of sight to kill her, and then find a secluded place to burn and salt the body. It has been a long day, first a full shift at work and then the hunt. The nymph put up a fight before I got her, and then to drag around a dead body before disposing of it, makes me crave nothing more than my sweet comfy bed.

I get home at around one in the morning and I just hope that Sam is asleep, because I really don’t feel up to explaining why I am home so late, and knowing Sam he is not going to let this one go by. I can tell from earlier that he didn’t fully believe my lie.

I walk straight into our bedroom without turning on the lights and using my phone for illumination. I try to be as quiet as possible when taking off my jacket, shirt and jeans, leaving only my boxers and an undershirt on. I lay down and try to reach for Sam and i’m disappointed when I only find cold sheets.   _‘Huh thats weird.’_ I think to myself and then whisper, “Sam?” There is no answer, so I move out of the bed and reach for the lights.

I check the bathroom, the lights are off and when I turn them on there is no sign of Sam. I head towards the kitchen, and I light up each room as I pass. There is a note on the kitchen table.

 

_Dean,_

_We are fine._

_And I get why you did it you know,_

_guess I just kept hoping that I was enough._

_It was unfair of me to try to change you._

_But I need some time before I see you._

_Please don’t try to find us, and take care of Jack._

_Sam_

 

As if on cue, Jack moves around my leg but i barely notice his presence. Instead I read the note three more times and I swear that it is written in another language because it is just not making any sense to me.  When it finally begins to sink in i move without remembering to make the conscience decision to move. I end up in our bedroom once more and I open the closet door only to find the one fourth of the clothes are missing. I quickly run to Dea’s room and a lot of her clothes and toys are also missing.

It hits me like a glass of cold water in the face, _‘they’re gone.’_

I swear it god that this feels worse than when Sammy left for Stanford. The air feels thin and I can hardly breathe. I’m confuse and hurt. I don’t understand why he left and why he took Dea with him.

I head back to the kitchen I dial Sam’ cell and it rings and rings until I realize that he has left the phone behind. I don’t give a second glance at the clock on the kitchen wall before I dial Bobby’s number. It rings five times before Bobby picks up

 _“‘llo?”_ Comes a sleepy voice on the phone

“Bobby?” I say and I barely recognize my voice. It sounds foreign and broken.

_“Dean if that's you at ass o’clock in the night, you better be dying.”_

Not dying but nearly close to it, instead i say. “They’re gone.”

And Bobby doesn’t need to ask who is gone to know whom I’m  referring too. I can barely hear bed springs, but I know that Bobby is moving around in his bed, probably sitting up before he speaks again. _“You idjit, what did you do?”_

I should be offended. “Bobby I didn’t do anything?”

 _“Cut the crap. You mean to tell me that this has nothing to do with how you went back to hunting without telling him?”_ His voice sounds tired.

“What? How did you..” I thought I was being discreet, there is no way he could have found out.

 _“Boy, is my job to know when I send a hunter to finish a job only to find out that it has been finished by someone who is suppose to be retired.”_ But of course I couldn’t expect anything less, even a semi-retired Bobby, is a very informed Bobby.

“No, there is no way he found out. Plus he wouldn’t just leave because of this.” I say.

_“You sure about that?”_

Dean pauses for a minute and thinks before answering. Sam would be piss about the hunting thing, but there has to be more to it, he wouldn’t just leave without getting a few words in. “Yes. He wouldn’t leave in the middle of the night with Dea because I went back to hunting. It has to be something else. “

I hear Bobby sigh, _“I’ll make some calls in the morning and see what I can dig up. But you know, that if he doesn’t want to be found…”_

I nod even though he can’t see me, “ I know.” If Sam doesn’t want to be contacted or found… I don’t even want to entertain the possibility that he disappears before we even get a chance to talk. Is not just Sam whom I’ll be losing, but Dea and my unborn child.

It feels like my world is crushing down, and it just seems so surreal. We were good, really good and I had to do something to screw it all to hell. If this has anything to do with hunting I will kick myself in the ass for being a lying  piece of shit and at this point I am not above begging for him to come back.

I can’t stay here and wonder if they are okay, although Sam assured me that they are. I can’t stay here and wonder if I will ever see them again and if things will once again go back to normal. I can’t stand the thought that it all has changed and that the little world we created, twisted as it is, could come to an end. I just need to get to Sam and beg him to take me back.

I have never wanted a house, a relationship and kids more than on the moment when i actually got it. And losing it now is unimaginable.

I move barely paying any attention to what i’m doing and by some miracle I end up dress and inside the Impala within in a couple of minutes. I start the car and I have no idea where I am going, all that is driving me is the thought of finding Sam.  I check the first two motels closest to the house and came up with nothing.

I pull out my phone and with one eye on the road and the other on my phone I dial Amelia’s number.

Amelia picks up on the second ring. She must have been close to the phone.  “Amelia?”

 _“Dean is everything okay?”_ Her voice is soft and quiet.

“Have you heard from Sam?” I ask.

 _“Sam? Dean is late, what's going on?”_ She says still in hush tone.

Something about Sam going missing tends to destroy any sense of manners. And then I remember how wonderful Amelia has been over the years.  “I’m sorry to be calling at this time.”

 _“Is fine I was up anyways. I was feeding Jay. What’s going on with Sam?”_ Amelias asks.

“I screwed up.” I look out the window and the streets are as empty and dark as i feel right now. “He left me…” I pass my knuckles over face and eyes, god I’m tired. “Can you please call me if you hear anything from him.”

 _“Of course.”_ She pauses for a second, _“And Dean, don’t worry he will be back. He loves you too much.”_

“Yeah.” I’m not too sure I completely believe her.  I hang up on her and I keep driving and the closer it gets to dawn it makes thing more real, that Sam is that much further way. I swear it god i’m puttin a god damn gps on that thing he drives around and calls a car.

What's killing me is that this isnt my life; the lying and the hunting. It hasn’t been for more than two years. And is stupid how I handled things. I knew I should have told Sam or at the very least called Bobby first instead of putting everything I now have on the line. Without trying to sound too melodramatic, my life is over without my little girl, Sam, and my unborn child. The thing is that the universe finally gave me everything, even things I didn’t know I wanted, and in an instant it took it away.

I shake my head, because I’m beginning to sound like Sam. _Enough brooding, and think god damn it. Where could they be?_ I keep driving and checking every motel around the area.  
  


I must have fallen asleep in the Impala because even before I open my eyes I can feel my whole body sore. I try to move around trying to loosen some of my muscles and then I realize what woke me. My pants are vibrating, and I dig in my pockets until I pull out my phone.

“‘llo?” My voice sounds rough and I still feel half asleep.

I hear breathing on the other side of the line. _“Dean?”_

I have heard that voice for my entire life, and boy does that one word have the power to jolt me up. “Sam? oh my god Sammy. Where are you? Are you guys okay?” And I’m not sure if i want to laugh out of pure relief or start sobbing for the same reason.

I can hear Sam exhale because he probably knows perfectly well that I’ll always worried about him, even when we fight. _“Yeah, we are okay.”_

“Tell me where you are. I’ll come get you.”

 _“Dean…”_ And the way that Sam says my name sounds like a warning. A reminder that we are not in good terms.

But I have so see him and Dea. “Come on Sam, please.”

_“Look Dean we are fine, but I’m not sure that I can see you right now.”_

I can hear Dea in the background, and there is just no way that I am giving up that easily. I am not beyond begging if it’ll get me somewhere. “Baby please. I don’t even know…” I better not finish that sentence because knowing Sammy, denial that I have done something wrong is as good as don’t bother trying to patch things up. “I just want to talk or… Let me at least see Dea for a few minutes.”

I hear him sigh again this time in resignation and I know that I have gotten through to him. Sam doesn’t talk for a couple of beats and i have to hold out the phone in front of me to make sure that he hasn’t hang up. He hasn’t and then he says, _“Kay, we are at the bed and breakfast, room 2B.The one twenty minutes from the house, ‘Sunny and Bright.’_ ”

They are so close, and in the only place I failed to look. “I’ll be right there.” I hang up and start the Impala. The ride to the bed and breakfast takes me half the time and only because I broke a few laws and did one too many illegal turns.

I walk up to the room and i lift my hands to knock and thats when it hits me that I have no idea what I am going to say to Sam. But this is Sam right? I should be able to tell him anything. I need to tell him the truth and beg for forgiveness. I knock once and I hear footsteps from inside.

Sam opens the door. “Hey.”

I look him over and his eyes look puffy and red. Shit he has been crying. “Hey.” I don’t get to say anything else because Dea runs up to me.

“Daaaddddyyyy” She says and I catch her in mid air.

“Hey babygirl.” I smile at her and she throws her little arms around my neck. Sam has moved away from the door so I finish walking in and I close the door behind me. I untangle Dea from my neck and I pull her away a little so that I can take a better look at her. “How are you? You miss me?”

She nods, “uh huh. I is good daddy and I miss you sooo much.”

I smile again, my god I love her. “Is that right?”

She shake her head again. “Yeeaaahhh. But i think dad miss you more.” She whispers.

“Oh yeah? And why do you say that?” I look over to Sam who is by the bed folding their pajamas and stuffing them in his duffel.  He looks up then, probably reacting to what Dea just said.

Dea says in a hushed voice,“He’s been crying. He says that he is hurting. I think he is sick. You should make him chicken soup, like when you make it when I get sick.” She says it like she is telling her daddy a secret.

I’m still looking at Sam, but he looks away and passes one of his hands by his eyes and then his hair. I can tell that he is hurting. But he isn’t sick, this is something I did. He is upset because I lied to him. I did this.

He turns around and I can see how glossy his eyes are, although he tries to obscure his face. He walks up to me and takes Dea from my arms. I can tell that he is trying really hard to avoid touching me. “Come on Dea, go watch tv for a little bit. I need to talk to daddy.”

Dea bounces excitedly knowing perfectly well that she never gets away with watching television before noon. I see her bounce out of his reach until she turns on the tv and settles with the morning cartoons.

I look back to Sam and I take a few steps towards him and I see him flinch. I really hate seeing Sam sad, and it hurts a million times more knowing that  I am the cause of it. “Sammy you okay?”

He just nods.

I approach him one more time and when he doesn’t move I trying to bring a hand up to his face. He moves away then. “Dean don’t, okay?” And his voice sounds small and broken.

Okay touching is out of the question. I face him again. “Sam how can I make this right?”

“You can’t….not right now. I just need time.”

“Time for what Sam?” I say and he looks at me like i’m slow. Like I should know what he is thinking.

He shakes his head slightly, and I can tell that he is disappointed. “I’m going to stay with Bobby for a while.”

He is really leaving me. I should have told him about hunting. I shouldn’t have lied to him. Now i'm losing more than just my brother. “And Dea?”

He looks a little baffled. “You can call her at anytime…” Sam sighs, “This is temporary okay? I’ll let you see her and the baby when is born. Just for right now, I can’t…”

I let out a breath i didn’t know I was holding. And relief doesn’t even begin to describe how I am feeling right now. I really thought I had fucked this up. “Thanks Sammy. I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want to upset you. I screwed up.”

“How long?” He asks, but I know that he is really asking, how long have you been lying to me?

“Maybe a couple of months.” And my god if he doesn’t look even more hurt.

“I just wished that you would have talk to me. Dean it was never my intention to change you. I knew that it was a big change for you getting married to me... and then the kids. I just I thought we were enough, I thought I was enough.” He looks broken again, and this time I see a single tear fall from his beautiful hazel eyes.

“ Sam you are enough. I should have told you.” And i fight the urge to go up to him and hold him in my arms and comfort him. What the hell was I thinking, when i started looking for the nymph?

He nods, “You still smell like her.”

I smell the inside of jacket, and he is right I smell like the nymph. “Sorry, I didn’t get a chance to shower.”

“Right.” And he looks disgusted. “Are you going to see her again?”

 _See her again?_ “What?”

“The brunette, are you going to see her again?” Sam asks.

“Why would I see her again…?” I’m confuse to say the least.

“I don’t know Dean, maybe because you went home with her last night and seem to enjoy her company more than you do mine.” Sam raises his voice, and as soon as he realizes it he looks to Dea and sees that she is very engrossed with the cartoons on tv.

“I what?” And everything is just falling into place. “Sam what exactly do you think I was doing last night?”

Sam tills his head in an expression so much like Castiel. “Dean, I don’t think you need me to draw you a picture. I saw you with her last night. And I’m pretty sure that what you guys did had nothing to do with replacing parts on a camaro.”

 _For fuck sakes_. I let out a laugh, “Please tell me…Sam I didn’t cheat on you.”

“Dean I followed you and I saw you. She was all over you.” Sam says and then he adds, “And all the lying and staying up late ‘working’?”

I let out another laugh because I can’t help it, and then pass one hand over my tired eyes.  “I was hunting.” I take a step towards him and I place a hand on his hip and thankfully he doesn’t move away.  I look him straight in the eyes, “Sam I did not cheat on you.”  I can tell that he believes me.

“But the girl, and the lying? You said months? Wait hunting?” Poor things looks all confused.

“God Sammy you are my only girl.” I smile at him and he smiles back. “Like I can ever find anything sexier.” And I pass a hand over the small swell in his belly. A pregnant Sam is a very sexy Sam.

“God Dean, that is one kink that you should have kept to yourself.”

“Oh come on Sammy, you know you love it when I…” I whisper sweet  naughty things into his ears. There is a kid in the next room. I leave a trail of kisses from his ears to his neck and he lets out a moan, but then backs away.

“Wait you were hunting?” He asks, and then I remember that I am still i’m trouble.

“Uh, yeah.” And my face heats up a bit from the embarrassment. “I’ve been tracking movements of the supernatural some time after the gates closed. It was a while before I got a lead on a few monsters that escaped the pull. Tonight there was a nymph about 5 miles from here. She was trying to breed before I stopped her.”

I see him nod, “Everything go okay?” He looks me over, accessing me like he use to right after a hunt and he was looking for injuries. “You are not hurt are you.” Well he is taking the news better than I expected. I suppose feeling unwanted is enough to feel emotionally drained.

“Sam I’m fine. And I won’t be doing that again, okay?”

“I thought that life was over for us you know? With Dea and now the baby” Sam says and I haven’t removed my hand from his belly and he puts his hand over mine.

“Is over Sam. You are enough, Dea and the baby are enough. I was being stupid and selfish and I shouldn’t have lied.”

He shakes his head, “Yeah you shouldn’t have lied.” He lets out a little laugh, “I can’t believe that all this time i though…”

“Are we good?” I ask him, because it is really important that i know that we can get pass this.

“Yeah we are good.” He says and my god does that lift this burden from me.

I nod, “Good, because I could really use a shower and then sleep. God I have forgotten how uncomfortable it is to sleep in the Impala.” I start taking off my jacket and shirt.

“Dean what are you doing?”

“Well you already paid for the room right?” He nods, “Okay well there is a perfectly good shower in the next room and a very comfortable bed right there. And maybe we can drop Dea off at Kim’s for a few hours and I’ll show you just how much you really do it for me.”

He smiles and wow does he glow. “Shut up you jerk.”

I’m half way down the halfway to the bathroom, but I look at him and wink.”But i’m your jerk.” I turn back to the bathroom and I can feel him smile.

  
  



End file.
